Have a glass of attitude adjustment

Have you seen those orange juice commercials? You know, the ones where people have imaginary conversations about the obstacles awaiting them in the day, then they bravely drink their juice and start the day with a super positive attitude?  Here’s one in case you’ve missed them: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4DHT7b0QjW8

Aside from the straight-faced delivery of the actors, one of the reasons these commercials are so funny is that most of us know we could never face a day of problems with such calm and a smile, no matter how much juice we drank. I feel privileged to actually know someone who embodies this enviable attitude, Amanda Younger. Full disclosure: I met Amanda and Joe Younger long before I agreed to take on this column. However, they embody some great couples-in-business principles so I really wanted to profile them.

Amanda and Joe have been married 23 years and have three daughters ranging from pre-school to college age.  Together they work toward the same family goals as independent ACN representatives providing essential home and small business services such as phone, internet, and television www.youngers.acnibo.com.   Their personalities and business skills are almost a perfect yin/yang blend of people skills, technical skills, introverted problem solving and extroverted dynamism. Amanda says, “Joe is very detailed in his thinking and has the ability to see the big picture from any angle. I tend to be more in the now and able to deal with the everyday tasks that need to completed. Where we both seem to do well under pressure, I do better closer to the ‘dead-line’ than Joe.”  Most importantly, the Youngers know how to bounce back.

All businesses have problems; all families encounter difficulties. For years research has shown that a positive attitude, resiliency in the face of adversity and a good dose of fearlessness is linked to long-term success. You simply cannot let bad events weigh you down, no matter how many happen in a row. One year, after a particularly tough January, the Youngers declared a New Year’s “do over” and restarted the year fresh in February with a family party—complete with sparkling drinks. Amanda feels that “… it’s our ability to look at the challenge as an opportunity to excel that helps both of us keep the proper perspective on life and business under the same roof.”

What if you weren’t born with this great outlook and ability? You can develop both. Start by cultivating the attitude of gratitude. Becoming aware of how much you do have and what is going RIGHT can help you to deal when things seem to go wrong. As Amanda told me, “At times we both view the glass as either half empty or half full, luckily we never seem to see it the same at the same time. However, both of us see the fact that we have a glass as a good thing and for that we are grateful.”

What do you mean there’s no vacation this year?

Business ownership is a journey and it is essential that both partners agree on the destination. When an entrepreneurial couple runs into trouble it’s often because they forgot to talk about what they wanted for the business and what they were willing to do (or give up) to get it. Your partner is more likely to see your views and demands as unreasonable if they come as a complete surprise.

Step One—Clarify goals: Early in the start-up process I recommend that couples spend some time defining success. If one partner sees the new business as a trip to millionaire retirement and the other envisions just a little “extra” money to supplement regular jobs, this disconnect in vision is going to lead to problems. Tools like vision boards or the help of a personal coach can help couples really create a vibrant and clear vision of their individual and couple definitions of success. Coaching tip: Consider drawing or writing about your ideal home, ideal business, ideal retirement etc. and then sharing these images with each other.

Step Two—Outline expectations: Some days running a business feels like an adventure. Some days it’s just plain old work. If you don’t let your partner know what you expect from them, entrepreneurship can be like torture. No one wants to find out by “surprise” that vacations and dinners out are off the schedule for the next five years. Talk about what you want, need and expect in the way of support and sacrifice at the beginning of the process, or you may get your own unpleasant surprise. The example I cite most often comes from one of the first small business courses I taught.

One of my students had written a business plan for a very ambitious start-up. The financials hinged on her husband and four teenagers working for the business for a year—for no pay. During a class discussion one night I asked her if she had shared her business plan, including the staffing, with her family. She hadn’t. I made this her homework for the week. At the next class meeting, to no one’s surprise but hers, the student reported that her entire family had refused her “offer of employment”. Though they were generally supportive of her business idea, none of them planned to work long hours for a year for free.

Agreeing on what you want as an entrepreneurial couple AND what you expect each partner to do to get there is essential for success. Roses, chocolates or tickets to an event make great surprises. Over due bills, secret to-do-lists and budget shortfalls do not.

Couples in Business Together Column by Karen Watts

Not only are you lucky you found your soulmate, but you've found a soulmate who is as entrepreneurial as you, who is willing to work as hard as you, and shares the same passions as you.

You're lucky enough to be a couple who are in business together.  We know it's not always roses and Valentine's Day.  That's why we've added our own resident expert, Karen Watts, to help you navigate the unknown when you go into business with your partner.

Learn More About Karen

In 2005 Karen drove across the country from North Carolina to the Northwest corner of Washington State alone to start a new life.  Karen has been a business consultant, coach and speaker since 1999. Now she happily serves clients on both coasts, providing entrepreneurs with practical, creative, caring, and effective ideas and solutions.

Her business writing has been featured in Forbes.com, Reach Magazine, and The Educator’s Voice. Karen has spoken to local, regional, national and international groups. In 2002 she presented a paper Promoting Entrepreneurship in the Community College Setting at the small business conference in Kuopio, Finland. She provided a workshop to other business educators in 2003 at the Forum on Entrepreneurship Education called So, now you’re the boss; teaching management skills. Most recently, Karen presented at the Nation Association for Community College Entrepreneurship in October of 2011 on What real business people can teach you about teaching entrepreneurship.

Audiences appreciate her straightforward and relaxed presentations about entrepreneurship and management issues. Karen is available for talks, workshops and one-on-one coaching. Learn more at http://karensouthallwatts.com.

Click here to see Karen’s contribution to our recent article 22 Tips to Get Your Clients to Pay On Time, Every Time!

Stay tuned for our first edition of the "Couples in Business Together" Column.

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